As most of the rest of you living in the southeast United States, we got a wonderful rain early Thursday morning. It washed all of that pollen away and SO FAR I haven't seen it re-emerge - but I know it's coming!!!! The rain here ended about 10:00 and the sun came out around 12:00 (noon) - all my hopes for an event free evening at home were dried up (literally). Emma Claire had softball practice at 3:15, which was wonderful - she played first base and did awesome!!!! She only let 2 balls get past her and she made 2 outs!!!!! It's a fun bunch of kindergartners with 2 first graders (we need SOMEONE who can throw the ball from 3rd base to 1st).
Anyhow, after softball practice I loaded my 3 plus 2 other girls up and we ran home to change into soccer clothes and shin guards, headed to McDonald's, then out to the soccer fields. The afternoon was going so smoothly, everyone was in good spirits, I had not even had to raise my voice once, except to yell to Emma Claire: "Get to First, Get to First-she's going to throw the ball to YOU!!!! GREAT JOB!!!" (This was her first time playing 1st base and SOMEONE had to teach her!!!)
SO, we got out to the soccer fields and the first thing I saw was Wilson and the girls running and leaping over the huge water puddles!!!! Now the night was already getting very chilly and we had a good hour and a half ahead of us and that wind wasn't going away any time soon. I knew if someone got wet it was not going to be a pretty night, especially since I was all on my own, with no husband (he had to work late), no grandparents (all out of town), and no sister (she did her soccer duty on Tuesday night). So I told the girls "No Water" and they all scurried away!!! I knelt down and told Wilson, no less than 3 times, that if he got anywhere NEAR that water, he was getting a spanking (yes, I spank) when he got home. I took him to the far side of the field where there was NO water and he began to play soccer with his friends. Emma Claire's game began and I was cheering and holding Henderson (who kept saying "cold, cold" over and over again). I looked up and there was Wilson playing in the water - soaked from the waist down. I walked over to him and told him what would happen when we got home and showed him where he should play and directed him in that direction. About 5 minutes later, another child shows up and is drawn to the water and Wilson is drawn too! Again, I get him out of the water, warn him about what is going to happen and set him off in the other direction. Ten minutes later, you can guess what happened again. --THE WATER!!!!! Bless his heart he just couldn't stay out of it - it was like an addiction. At this point, I handed Henderson off to my friend, Ashley, and took Wilson to the car for a "talk". He did not go back to the water after this, UNTIL his game began and low and behold if there are not mud puddles ON his field and a HUGE water puddle right behind the goal. Ya'll, he could not take 10 steps without being "drawn" to the puddles, anytime he'd run past it, he stop and stomp a few times then head on after the ball. Now I understand he is 3 years old and a little boy and that's just what "boys do", but I also know that when I tell one of my children not to do something, I expect them to comply or have consequences. I try to hold firmly to the verse:
Simply let your 'Yes' be 'Yes,' and your 'No,' 'No'; anything beyond this comes from the evil one. Matthew 5:37 (the evil one???? OUCH!!!!)
I'm trying really hard to be consistent and follow through, so there will be no doubt where I stand. Wilson has had somewhat of a rough year at school, not following the rules, being a little "wild" during Bible Time in the sanctuary, etc. So needless, to say, I am very motivated right now to be firm and consistent with him. The problem is, when I got home, I was exhausted, I felt horrible for being "on" him all night long - especially for something as menial as a water puddle, but I feel like I have to stand by my word. What are your thoughts?
4 comments:
kellie...first of all, thank you SO much for the post about the easter baskets, that was so kind of you! and secondly, i love your parenting style. i do it much the same. you HAVE to stick by your word, or it means little. and i think being firm but loving is key. i applaud you!
I feel the same way Kellie. I feel like I am always on Brooks but I want to be consistent with him too. We have issues with listening right now and doing as we are told or he gets the wooden spoon. I don't always pull it out b/c alot of times just the threat of it does the job. It is a struggle but I've always heard if we don't make sure they know whose boss right now, we'll pay dearly for it later!
I just have to chime in here! I am totally with you in the consistency thing and yes, we spank too! As for not following through when you got home? Well, let's just say that as a mom whose husband travels A LOT, sometimes you just have to give yourself a break (especially when you're on your own) and let it go! I feel that as long as we are consistent the majority of the time, that in the long run, you will be successful! There - that's my two-cents! Your kids are very well-behaved so I wouldn't worry and ya'll are awesome parents!
Hi Kellie, After raising 3 boys, I understand just how much he was drawn to the puddles...sort of the 'forbidden fruit'. This was always my theory. Children will be children, and they are going to do childish things...that's when we need patience. But, an act of 'deliberate disobedience' requires punishment. We do our children a disservice if they get awy with deliberately doing the wrong thing! And, I spanked, too!
Let me say this, too. It's OK not to see 'everything'. Somethings can best be dealt with by just 'not seeing' it. You always need to save your big guns for the big offensives...else they won't make a difference. One more thing...LOGICAL CONSEQUENCES...it is OK for kids to suffer the consequences of their actions...especially after they have been helped to remember several times. I took gym clothes left at home 3 weeks in a row...the 4th week...I refused. He suffered the consequences at school and missed going somewhere he really wanted to, but he never forgot his gym clothes again!
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